Entertainment and Lifestyle

Comrades, the month of love is beckoning

People go to campus for various reasons including searching for potential husbands and wives! It is not a new thing to see comrades graduating with degrees and babies at the same time. Even worse, the month of love is here and comrades are on a last minute mission to score last minute dates. Well, boychild, let me give you some advice about some campus women.

USIU ALIENS

Damsels from USIU are international tourists who sometimes act like they are in Kenya by mistake. It’s on a sunny day, but you will see her shivering under 13 trench coats just because she heard it’s winter in America. She could be knowing what Kim Kardashian wore on Friday and may not even be aware who Amina Mohamed is. If you planning to wife a woman from USIU, just know she’s not the kind you will take to your rural home and leave her to farm.

They are so sophisticated that they will be falling ill when the WiFi signal in the house is acting up. And by the way, you will spend the entire dating period knowing that her real name is Kai Kangs till on the wedding day when you hear the priest say “Do you take Kairuthi Kangai Mto’Mkindia…”

CATHOLIC UNIVERSITY SAINTS

If you are looking for that perfect wife, then you will easily confuse one in Catholic University. But if you are looking for a girlfriend to get wild with, kindly turn around and crawl elsewhere. First of all, women from ‘catho’ are always in long dresses and you will never see anywhere beyond the knee till marriage, and probably not before three months after the wedding just to be sure it was true love.

So brother, if you are the chairman of Team Mafisi, it is prudent that you know you will only be drooling at her ankles. These saints don’t go to clubs, so don’t in your wild thoughts ask her out if it’s not to a kesha. If you do, she will blatantly tell you, “Twerking will give me a man for the night. Praying will give me a husband for a lifetime!” And if you think you will lure her into a come-we-stay union, please reconsider.

She must say her vows in a church before she can replace her purity ring with a wedding ring. And by the way, these females are so anchored in religion that she will first have to meet your parents before she can even hug you!

I thought you should know.

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