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What nobody tells you about marriage

Waithera Otieno @loveNlust 69

You will not always be sexually attracted to your spouse.  And yet, when you first started dating, you couldn’t keep your hands off each other. This can be confusing. Sometimes your sweetheart will irritate you, occasionally you will be repulsed by somethings they do.

You may even be attracted to other people! It is normal for the feelings of attraction towards your partner to change from time to time. Your feelings of love towards your partner also change.

Sometimes you will feel loving towards them and sometimes you will feel indifferent. Occasionally, you might even resent them. For your marriage to thrive, you will need to act lovingly towards your partner even when you don’t feel the love.

When you get married, you dream about reproducing little adorable people who look just like you. You want to nurture them into successful adults who will be the pride of your old age.

The truth is that having children changes the dynamics of your relationship in either a positive or a negative way. Parenting comes with responsibilities that eat into your time and energy. Children can also be rebellious, needy and you cannot predict how they turn our as adults.

This can cause a strain in the relationship. For a successful marriage, you will need to retain energy, time and space for you two as a couple, independent of your children, so that your marriage survives the parenting phase.

Marriage will not complete you.  If you are looking for marriage to feel better about yourself or to solve some of your financial, self-esteem and social status challenges, you are looking in the wrong place.  Even if you are married, you are responsible for your own personal growth, sense of purpose and happiness. You are also responsible for your life choices. – [email protected]

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