So, your friend is getting married and you’ve been asked to be a bridesmaid? Before you accept the invite, you’ll need to think about it for a minute. Faith Kyoumukama explores the factors to consider before giving it a nod
1. It’s okay to say no
In as much as we want to support our closest friends, it is okay to decline the request. It might hurt the bride or groom, but if you think accepting the invite will cost you an arm and a leg, it’s better to avoid it.
Also, not everyone loves to be in the bridal party and sometimes you just don’t have time, so declining would do you some good.
2.You will spend money
Being in the bridal party is not as easy as just dance slipping into a pair of heels and looking glam. No! All that costs money; from the head down. The detailed expenses, especially when it comes to make-up, hair and the outfits, requires monetary investment and sometimes it can be heavy.
3.You’ll step out of comfort zone
If you don’t do make-up or wear your hair in an up-do, you might want to give all that up and get in line and do as the bride pleases. After all, it’s her wedding day. If you completely cannot do it, you might want to have a sit-down and come into a compromise. Remember this might put your personal relationship with the bride (or the groom) in the line.
4. You will definitely clash
Imagine, for instance, a bridal party line-up of 12 people. These individuals come packed with different characters, tastes and…name it. All this is a mix-up of emotions, opinions and attitudes. So, clashing, disagreeing, fighting will likely emerge, but at the end of the day, you will have to stick to the agenda. Don’t keep anything to heart.
5. Observe protocol
Don’t give yourself a role that belongs to the maid of honour. It will embarrass you. In case you have a concern you might want the bride to know or address, just suggest it through the maid of honour. She is in the inner core of things and can pass the message to the bride.
The bride is certainly dealing with a lot of pressure, so it might be safe to let the maid honour do her job. But sometimes, you should not be too expectant; bureaucracy exists everywhere.
6. Recognise people’s tastes
When you are in a bridal party, keep in mind people have different tastes. What you like might not be other people’s preference. So, try and understand this and it will help you compromise on some issues. People are brought up differently, in that one might like chunky heels while another prefers a divergent choice.
7. Availability is key
Your investment would be highly needed in planning the wedding because that is what the bride expects of you. If you don’t have enough time, you might want to either disclose this to the bride or step down for another person. Being unavailable might cause a strained coordination between you and other members of the bridal party.
8. It’s not your party
The dress may fit you weirdly and your hair may end up making you feel like a new girl straight from the village. You may not want to wear pointed shoes or burgundy lipstick, but you’ll need to fake it till the end. You have to make it through the wedding. And that is what it is.
9.Clarity before commitment
Before you commit to the duties and roles of bridesmaids, you have every right to ask about whatever concerns you. You need to know what kind of time and financial commitments you’re expected to make, so you can decide whether it’s right for you accepting the invite or not.
10. It’s supposed to be fun
Despite the challenges you meet on the way, being a bridesmaid is (should be) tonnes of fun. Don’t forget that you should (or expected to) be enjoying every moment of it. That should be the bottom line. So, you better check yourself out first.