A fortnight ago, we carried a piece about how Kenyan clubs, especially in Nairobi, carry on with the annoying habit of overplaying overrated music. I agree we’ve had enough; enough of overplayed music and enough of meeting creepy people in clubs.
Yes, they exist and if you get a chance to read this article, you will attest to the fact that nightclubs provide you with a cast of characters that will amaze, disgust and never fail to entertain.
First, there is the weird one who is always on phone texting (read sexting) or God knows what. Who are you texting or indulging with at 2am?
You’d rather stick to some corner of the club, instead of carrying on your weird business at the middle of the dance floor, while our favourite overrated Naija music is blasting. No one is more important than that.
Secondly, there is always that guy at the counter, seated alone, sipping a cold Guinness kubwa and stares the whole night. That’s a no and we cannot handle that any longer.
Thirdly there’s always that guy who gets awfully drunk, who every time your eyes meet utters words such as “Oh, my God! I love you so much! Why don’t we hang out more?” They actually turn out to be the friendliest and create most memories, but once this is overdone, it can get annoyingly disturbing.
Then, there are the usual slay queens who get weird as the night grows older. They walk in on their high heels, well pampered, silky hair and slim figure, but sadly, all of that can be instantly ruined when you see them drunk, puking and passed out on the road with their undergarments exposed.
That’s not hot at all, it’s disgusting and a real turn off. So, let’s try and tone it down a bit and have fun in clubs.
Lastly, almost every night, there would be a fight in the club and most are exclusively between men. It could be because of something as stupid as someone was looking at the wrong way or somebody bumped into somebody in a crowded club.
I know it can be aggravating when someone gets in your face. But keep your cool and walk away. You wouldn’t want to make a spectacle out of yourself and be known as ‘the guy who got into that fight.’ It’s not attractive to women either. So, let’s handle our clubbing with some decorum!