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Of the guy who visits empty-handed

Then there’s this boyshaod breed. “What’s for lunch/dinner/ brunch (to each their meal of choice)…?” Before you even think of typing ‘…Uuum didn’t feel like cooking today,’ they will say, ‘on my way’, and knock at a girl’s door two minutes later.

A friend complained about always attracting these ill-mannered humans. It doesn’t end with the text. So, two minutes he’s knocking at her door because etiquette demands that ‘On my way’ or ‘be there in a few’ means just that, a few and on his way from the gate to your doorstep. He keeps time this one. You’ll receive him at the doorstep, manners intact.

So, like the good boy he is, he removes his shoes and that’s where the manners give birth to ill. No they were actually twins, good and ill, but unfortunately, good was lost along the way. Man child puts his legs on the table and awaits kings treatment. “Bae
” All this while he didn’t stop to think of grabbing a few things from the supermarket, market heck even the hague shop at the gate. Nothing. Even those tatu
tropicals they hawk on highways. No. It’s just him and his strong scent, one of those bomber half coats they wear nowadays, silver chain (if you’re unlucky) and oh plenty of ideas.

Wet fry this, dry fry that and I mean food unless you harbour other ideas. Position this, position that, and I mean TV mounting position unless you harbour different ideas. He’ll pop up on her in the kitchen, and comment how the food smells nice, but taking forever. Then he’ll consult the fridge to see if there’s anything edible.

But where do men harvest such shameful behaviour? Back then, a man wouldn’t comfortably visit a woman’s house leave alone resting his feet on her table. Today? Well, today they even camp for days on end and have the nerve to make endless demands. How they sit there and wait for first-class treatment at a chiqs house, the world will never know. He assumes that she enjoys having him over and playing wife mixing up and marinating ingredients for him.

Women play that independent card, it’s allowed. But there’s nothing as disgusting as a man who feasts and gets his way with the woman, yet visits empty-handed. And it doesn’t mean you buy the food you eat and every ingredient in it (salt included). No. Because it’s not a necessity,  just courtesy. But…well…do that shopping once in a while. If not, show up with a bottle of wine, juice, chocolate, just a gift…KDF as well (you’ll have yourself to blame if this one backfires). Anything, just don’t visit swinging your hands for Pete’s sake! Style up.

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