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Money cannot buy everything? Truth is, exceptions are few!

Money may not buy you happiness—as the saying goes— but it will allow you a lot of other things including a few bizarre services…

Pay ‘disciple’ to attend church service for you

Do you feel too lazy to wake up early on Sunday morning for a church service? Well, you need not feel guilty about missing the service because there is a whacky solution to that!

Disciples For Hire is a group of folks in Florida who make money by attending services for those who cannot and tithe on their behalf. For an equivalent of Sh2,500, the hired ‘apostle’ will attend the service, take down notes from the sermon, tithe an amount of your choice and even pray on your behalf! That way, you can relax at home while someone does the holy work for you.

Rent man to wipe your tears or make you cry

Women are primarily sentimental beings and some enterprising folks are reaping from this trait. Ikemeso Danshi is the name of a service in Japan offered to women, where men are hired to wipe one’s tears.

For those who find it difficult to bring cry but still want your tears wiped, the service also offers videos they can show you to encourage you to cry. The Ikemeso man will wipe your tears with a well-made handkerchief during the therapeutic crying session, a service referred to as “cheek pong.”

You get to choose from a selection of photos of the men and can also choose their personality type and the Ikemeso-for-hire will travel to your home or office to wipe your tears away.

Get person to slap you anytime you are distracted while at work

It is a fact that many people get distracted when at work. Agents of distraction at the workplace range from use of social media to that face-rising colleague who turns heads when she passes by.

To combat distraction and raise his productivity, a man from San Francisco, US, named Maneesh Sethi got a pretty unique solution to this problem; he hired someone to slap him in the face if he went off task. His productivity went from 38 per cent to 98 per cent during the period he engaged the ‘slapper’.

Hire someone to kidnap you

A French company called Ultime Realite offers a bizarre service of a complete, simulated kidnapping to clients, who pay anywhere from an equivalent of Sh100,000 to Sh300,000.

Thriller seekers are stalked for around five to seven days after signing a terms of reference form. They will then be seized by men in black, tossed into a car, and left in a holding cell or other undisclosed location.

Clients will be interrogated, robbed, threatened or held for ransom depending on the nature of the experience they have selected. A negotiator may be brought in to discuss terms. Captivity may last up to 11 hours before the “victim” is finally released.

They end relationship on your behalf for a pay

Breaking up a relationship can be a difficult task. So in case you are finding it hard to shatter the heart of your significant other, try the services of pundits at the Breakup Shop, an online company, to do your relationship dirty work for you.

The site allows you to pay to have someone else end your relationship for you by text or e-mail. This might be just the right service for someone without the courage to break up with their boyfriend or girlfriend themselves.

Ending a relationship is financially feasible, with a breakup text costing an equivalent of Sh1,000, a letter costing Sh2,000, and a breakup phone call running at Sh2,900.The phone call option lasts a minute in length but is promised to do the job.

The Breakup Shop promotes the text option for those who “really don’t care.” You get to decide when the 100-word text message is sent to your soon-to-be ex. The letter is described as the more refined option, allowing you to send a message curated by breakup experts.

Fancy being ‘wanted’ fugitive on the run?

Ever fancied the idea of being on the run with people after you, but you have never gathered courage to become a criminal? There is a service for that; you can purchase a manhunt package from a France based company called Ultime Realite for around an equivalent of Sh200,000, with your role being the fugitive.

You will be followed through a high stakes, apparently dangerous chase involving rugged terrain, boats, city streets and wilderness areas, trying your hardest to avoid being captured. Few thrills compare to the realistic experience of running for your freedom, or your life.

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